Thursday, April 26, 2012

A Lesson In Computing

The "o" of his "hello" is barely passed his lips before he's opening the laptop and commencing the daily melt-your-brain function of laughing at videos (the humor of which I don't understand) and playing games (the plot-line of which I don't even try to comprehend).

But I'm faster then him today.

I block his path with a well-placed arm and an awkward spread-eagle in the doorway that denies his passage.  He thinks it's a game.  He giggles and dodges but I shall not be moved.

"Where you going, Zander?"

"The computer." Of course.

"Why?"

"Because I want to."

"Tell you what...if you can give me ten reasons why you want to use the computer I'll let you go on."  Oh, I'm so clever!

"What?" And he tries to move passed again but I deflect him with a poke in the side and a wink.

"Come on, mom," he says.

"Ten things."

He's uncomfortable now.  Chewing his lip.  Pleading with his eyes and starting to believe that I really mean it.

"You can't think of one?"

"Um...I enjoy it."

Lame.  "One," I say and I stick a finger up in the air.

"Um...I like watching videos."

Lame.  "Two."  There goes another finger though neither of those answers should have counted.

"Um...computer skills are important."

Okay, better.  "Three."

I wave those three fingers in the air and he switches from one foot to the other and keeps biting the inside of his lip and staring at the ceiling like the answers might be written there.

"Well???" I ask.

"I can't think of any more."

"Then why in the world would you want to do something so boring?"

He shrugs.  "It's just something to do."  Not an acceptable answer.  He does not get a forth finger.

"I'll bet if I asked you to give me ten reasons you want to go to camp this summer you could ring them off without hardly thinking."

"Yeah."  And he does.  Like it's nothing.

"So, Zander...what have we learned here?"

He shrugs.

"Maybe the computer isn't quite as important to you as you thought it was," I tell him.  "Maybe you just go on because it's easy or convenient or saves you from having to come up with something else to do."

"Maybe...." but he's hesitant to really agree and tries to move passed me again.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"The computer."

"Seven more things."

He sighs.  Grabs his book.  Curls up in a chair.

Mission accomplished!

Just get him outside and suddenly he remembers what it means to be a kid and how much fun is to be had!


Saturday, April 14, 2012

Please Forgive Me - Toby Whithouse Is Robbing Me Of Time

We never stop spinning, do we?  Busy weighs me like an anvil and I wish my bed was actually comfortable because I'd fall into it and sleep until 2013 - truth is my bed is a rescued relic from a dead ladies apartment (no wonder I believe in ghosts).  Speaking of - Being Human - recommended by a friend and avoided because it sounded campy and lame.  Please forgive me.  It's bloody brilliant!  (That's my British accent - good, isn't it???)  And please, please, please, for the love of all things artistic and beautiful  - if you're going to give it a go DO NOT watch the American version.  I did.  It is not worth a moment of your precious time.  This, however will capture you - (and a John Stamosesque vampire is just the sweet and deadly little cherry on top).