But I didn't.
I think I hesitated for a moment, a little tickle of fear...this could be a nail in my coffin...but honesty can set you free, right?
"In five years? I want to write. If we could afford it. If I didn't have to work. I just want to write."
So there it is. Just like that. And as I said it I knew it was my absolute truth.
I love my job. I have amazing creative freedom, great opportunity for growth, and I'm part of a team that believes in me and values my influence. We've fought our way back after a hell of a year and it didn't occur to me to walk away. I am blessed. I don't want to leave. I mean, look at us...
He didn't shoot down my response. He didn't label it a pipe dream and drop it like it was meaningless trash. He invited me to live in it. To shape my current position to better accommodate my passion for words. To give a platform to practice my craft and hone my skills and actually do a better job at my actual job by doing it. Creative Communications. Writing should fit there like a pea in a pod.
Did I say I was blessed?
When I win the lottery I will tender my resignation. Then I'll volunteer to do all the fun parts of my job for free on my own timetable: website, graphic design, social media management. I'll sleep in until 8 and read until 10 and write until dinner which will be served to me in a rose covered pergola by my personal chef, Giles.
I have never purchased a lottery ticket. I suppose my chances are just slightly lower than one who does.