July 3, 2014

My Missing Computer Gave Me Phantom Limb Syndrome

When you've been together long enough you become that beautiful kind of union that people write songs about. You may be a full entity on your own but when you find yourself without the other you suddenly recognize your dependence and think, for a moment, that perhaps Tom Cruise really had it right when he stood before his love with his heart leaking out his eyes and said, "you complete me."

My Missing Computer Gave Me Phantom Limb Syndrome - SelfBinding Retrospect by Alanna Rusnak

My computer and I, we've been through some hard times. I've known the benefit of her therapeutic keys while she sat and listened and spell-checked and never grew too tired.

Until she got too tired.

And J K and L just gave up like somebody poured coffee on them though {hand to God} that never happened.

I wanted the best care for her.  I took her to the best doctor. 

It was going to take one week.  She needed a whole new keyboard.

ONE WEEK!???!

For seven long days I was without her.  I would reach for her and she would be gone.  I sat at the basement kids computer, trying to force some creativity through those sticky keys. I tried typing on the iPad but that was just frustrating.  I answered emails from my phone - yuck!

I've read about phantom limb syndrome. About how a dog-sledder might lose their foot to frostbite and still reach to scratch the itchy ankle that isn't there. That was me - searching for the piece that was missing when I reached out to scratch.

How very sad - this dependence. 

How desperate.

How typical of the world we now live in.

I remember fifth grade and how the school had ONE computer - a grey beast tucked away in the smelly E.A. office at the top of the gymnasium bleachers - and how the days when it was my turn to type something were like a giant cherry on top of a bulging banana split with sprinkles and how I thought 'someday I will have a computer of my very own and I won't have to finish cursive writing drills to be able to use it!'

And I remember the typewriter and the chip-chip-chip and the ding and how very heavy it was and how hard you had to hit those keys and how I'd feed the paper slowly to get it perfectly straight only to have it come out perfectly crooked and how my dad would say, 'use all your fingers when you type!'

And while my computer friend was gone I thought about all these things but all I wanted was to have her back in my possession {because the moment she was gone I was awash with inspiration for new tales to tell}!

When my phone finally sounded with the email saying she was ready for pick up I gathered the children and left the dirty dishes where they were and drove the hour and twenty minutes to where she waited down the leg of a mall just off the highway.

Oh, was she beautiful! {And God bless Apple Care because the cost was exactly $0 and a great big grin from the Genius Bar guy.}

you have filled my heart with greater joy psalm 4:7


Reunion is a beautiful thing. A new keyboard is a beautiful thing. And I can only hope beautiful things come out of our continued relationship as I seal my fingerprints into each of her shiny-fresh keys and continue on in the narrative of my stories because {heaven only knows why} people like to read them.

{This post is dedicated to my baby sister who seemed most perturbed by my lack of posting due to my lack of computer. My apologies, dear one - I will strive to regularly ease your boredom with my witty repartee!}

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2 comments:

  1. Heidi EastmanJuly 04, 2014

    My life is complete again!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Love your whitty repartee!!

    ReplyDelete

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